All of it was like a sledgehammer against his heart, it really was. But the last statement stopped him cold. It took him a moment to realize that she could see that.
"You know why I did it?" He said, slowly. "Because after all those other times where it wasn't us, and the near misses, and the messing with our heads - there was a shot. A clear, perfect shot. You remember Kerry? She told me I should just retire, and be with you. And I was a damn idiot not to listen. Maybe then it'd have turned out..."
He shook his head, banishing that thought.
"No. No more might-have-beens, false memories, or magically done marriages. Because of Grace. And Gracie. Something's here, and while I'm scared to hell of losing you again? I can't keep away from you. I just can't. And for a while there, I had the thought in my head that every day involved coming to a home, and to you. So you know what I want. Pain and all. What do you want?"
no subject
"You know why I did it?" He said, slowly. "Because after all those other times where it wasn't us, and the near misses, and the messing with our heads - there was a shot. A clear, perfect shot. You remember Kerry? She told me I should just retire, and be with you. And I was a damn idiot not to listen. Maybe then it'd have turned out..."
He shook his head, banishing that thought.
"No. No more might-have-beens, false memories, or magically done marriages. Because of Grace. And Gracie. Something's here, and while I'm scared to hell of losing you again? I can't keep away from you. I just can't. And for a while there, I had the thought in my head that every day involved coming to a home, and to you. So you know what I want. Pain and all. What do you want?"