Oh, but how were we to know?

[lucre]

Who: Joshua and Lucrezia
What: to carnage or not to carnage; that is the question
When: after Lloyd's departure
Where: the creepy mansion
Rating: adults beware, children welcome let's say PG-13!

The letter came bearing the name Lloyd Irving; easy enough to recognize when he was the only man to have crafted for her the first real set of pearls in Paradisa. There is still a difference between objects that appear out of thin air and those that take hard work and care to pound and carve into shape. The latter has value, albeit mostly sentimental, while the former has none whatsoever. To think he would send a letter to Joshua, most curious.

Lucrezia must make an incongruous sight with the lavish pearls now about her neck, with her bare feet and otherwise plain white nightgown (never mind that it's already late in the morning), like a child playing dress-up with her mother's jewelry. At least her hair is loosely coiled down her back, if only to show the earrings more clearly and make her quiet enough to sneak up on Joshua, as if that's even possible. She needs only to follow the music to its source, the sound of the piano echoing through all the hallways, holding her breath as she walks on tiptoes behind him.

She thinks he must already notice her presence even before she stepped into the room, but it is fun to pretend. Sometimes he might be distracted enough that he might be genuinely surprised, or perhaps he would pretend for her. She moves to tickle his sides even as she wraps her arms about his waist, giggling in his ear in lieu of a hello.

Comments

[lucre]

Everything is a gamble, and she has always liked flying too close to the sun. But a danger that has the ever placid Joshua worried must be worth the concern. She sighs, lowering her hands so she can fiddle with his fingers in thought. "Must we hide and wait for danger to come?"

[ofhope]

A guttural growl begins as a soft rumble within, though it settles before it can even pass his clenched teeth. There is so much she's a fool about, and clueless on. Certain things he can't expect her to know; his history...and battle tactics. Maybe he ought to teach her chess after all.

"I'm not hiding."

[lucre]

She looks up to see his face. Better to know what's coming if he is indeed angry at her.

"Are you waiting?"

[ofhope]

It's irritation, but nothing more. At least it is focused on her, and none other, but it's hardly a warm feeling for either party no doubt. Even now, how is it that he feels completely alone? He wouldn't want her to leave, but there are some things she can't understand. Won't ever.

And he doesn't care, normally wouldn't, but here he is without a plan and this time there's nobody directing him. Lucrezia's idea has merit, but it depends on too many unpredictable factors. Normally those are fun; he likes the excitement. But in this he cannot risk a third humiliation.

"I'm thinking..."

Sighing, Joshua abruptly turns his head away, one hand reaching up to drag his fingertips against a temple as if in a partial massage, or as if trying to push something out. He growls again, this time fuller, though it's away from her, and he shudders. It hurts.

"Why didn't they try sooner? Why did they leave?"

[lucre]

Irritation is an unfamiliar feeling from him, when even her most foolish moments only earned her a chuckle or a placid smile before. It hurts but she only allows herself a moment. She lets his hand go, as if it's the only thing she can do to retaliate, or to help him think better. Perhaps the latter.

Lucrezia draws a sigh and steps away, finding an excuse in placing the crumpled letter on the piano. Gingerly, like the weapon itself.

"What if it is an empty threat?"

[ofhope]

His hand drops away from his temple, slamming roughly against the window pane. It shudders with him.

"I told you, they resisted my powers once! They have a way."

And then, softer, so soft it's near a whisper.

"Father Nightroad could lie to them all...but he couldn't lie to me, no matter how much he tried. I knew him too well."

[lucre]

Lucrezia is glad for the piano to lean back against, one hand striking the highest notes while the other reaches for her necklace out of habit yet finding none. The only question in her mind is what can I do? What can I do?

She lowers her voice to match his too. "Lloyd Irving and Father Nightroad. Who else could know?"

[ofhope]

"Know, know..."

Again he drags his hand across a temple, this time stopping to dig just behind his ears. Eventually, if he isn't careful, he might draw blood.

"Clark. Colette. Yuan." Names and faces that are long gone. "Their allies..."

[lucre]

Lucrezia doesn't stop him, watching still with a certain morbid sense of curiosity. Perhaps cruelty. It is rare to see him so affected and she knows not to step in before her time. She curls her hands into fists to keep herself in place.

Clark and Colette, the undefeatedly good and naïve. Mostly naïve. "What do you need? A partner? Allies?"

[ofhope]

He hisses.

"Silence."

[lucre]

There's a brief moment when she thinks to oblige. But no.

Lucrezia shoots him a glare, a warning if anything of the sort can be given to one like Joshua. She leaves the letter there when she turns to leave, swiping all the keys with her hand as she goes. Silence he says.

[ofhope]

She's a fool; a sweet fool.

"That's what I wanted then. What I would have done...when you left. Gotten true silence."

It's no attempt to call her back, she can have her fits however she wants, but his voice follows through the vast room. Isn't she always curious? She doesn't have to say the words for him to hear them.

"She kept me from it. Would you?"

[lucre]

She knows, she knows he's playing to her curiosity. Hasn't he always called her ignorant? This is her chance he says before he again calls her a fool. Lucrezia doesn't even reach the door when she gives in, whirling about all bristling with fury.

"Who? Colette or do you mean Fiore? Can you even tell us apart?" A lady should not shout, but what does she care? She gives him silence, the kind she knows and not the kind he wants, only to collect herself.

"Then ask me to leave."

[ofhope]

"...Colette."

He needs time again to answer that, not understanding her anger or even the suggestion of Fiore's name. What does Fiore have to do with any of this, he wonders. Why wouldn't he be able to tell them apart? And then he wonders no more, because he can never spare his thoughts long on such things.

"Not this then. Then then." He moves, but not close, just around the piano, one hand never straying far from his temple. There are scratches, and there will be more. Again she's the fool, the sweet fool, the pretty fool, and she's only frustrated because she just doesn't know why, and the biggest secret of all is that he knows less than her.

"When I first invited you here, and you sent Brown. And then there was nobody. And so I wanted there to be...nobody."

[lucre]

To think they played often with the idea. Him the monster keeping the princess locked away. In a mansion or big glass box or a coffin. She is more afraid of being alone than anything else but he prefers the opposite. It's not fair, when before she wanted to hurt him but now the scratches on his head hurts her instead. Who is the monster?

She wipes her foolish, foolish tears away with the back of her hand, setting her jaw to make herself feel stronger. But her voice is resigned.

"I will not. I am not her. If it is silence you want then that is what you will have."

[ofhope]

She keeps spouting foolishness, still not understanding. Sometimes she's so quick, her skill at word play usually allowing them to lose hours in conversation, something that few can claim. She holds his attention, more than anyone. For all the times she's found emptiness in his gaze, there have been even more moments where his midnight passions and ever-lurking possession could more than make up for it.

Now it's no different, suddenly in the door she was earlier seeking, and now the horns are visible but so are the veins, as jagged as the scratches he makes while digging behind his ears and out, then back. Back and forth.

"Do you think that it matters where your feet carry you, when I want silence? It has nothing to do with the noise of your voice, princess, and you're smart enough to know better. I wouldn't have wanted it if you hadn't left. It was Paradisa that would have been silent; would have been stopped.

Would that have been better? You, too..."

If nothing else, she would have been frozen in time with her brother. Everything would be nothing. She doesn't know. None of them know. Someone should know.

"And me."

[lucre]

Fear sets in her stomach as soon as she sees him vanish, expecting that purple light or hands about her throat. There is no leaving, whatever he said in the beginning, she knows. Finding him standing by the exit only has her chuckling wryly, barely a sigh. He needs not try so hard when he says so himself, do you think that it matters where your feet carry you? But on the first night, he gave her the key to escape.

Lucrezia makes her way to the door regardless, stopping only far enough not to walk into him.

"But I am here," she raises a hand, venturing her fingers closer to his face to trail over his wounds but not to touch, eyes wandering to his chin but not daring to look up. "I cannot give you silence."

[ofhope]

He had, perhaps foolishly. It's debatable whether he would remember telling her something that might seem so obvious, perhaps only to those who truly knew of Colette's trials... Rather, her betrayal.

But that escape would be to buy her silence, more than it would for him.

"If I stopped everything, then there would be. All would be." Hadn't they spoken of it? Keeping her in a glass cage... But would he be able to look after her?

"Would you stop me?"

[lucre]

Writing messages on the glass each day. And she had laughed.

Lucrezia blinks away her tears as if they are hindering her, bowing her head to hide them. She isn't sad for herself. When she does look up, she dares the tips of her fingers to brush against his hair, eyes straying to find his. "You want me to stop you."

[ofhope]

He seems to struggle with the answer, as much as he struggles with whatever he's attempting to dig directly out of his skull with his own hands. Both hands now, as he shakes his head though not in denial.

A shudder; again, and again, as the noise trickles in. His eyes are closed now. "They wouldn't win, if everything was stopped. They wouldn't win."

[lucre]

Enough is enough. Lucrezia makes to grab both his wrists and wrest them away from his head, forceful enough to bruise if she can only catch him. There is little use in keeping quiet now when all she can't stop herself from feeling frightened, for him and for herself. She thinks he wants to dig out the sound of her fear from his head.

"We can go away, as far as we can, where they will never find us. Then-- you would not have to choose."

[ofhope]

There's no resistance, nothing but blood and skin under fingernails and wrinkled, unbuttoned sleeves for her to grip at and play keep-away. His eyes finally open at that, but they stare down, down between them as if right there in time and space is a way out.

"Where..." It's a mutter, and barely an acknowledgment, but it's there. As much as he is.

[lucre]

It's all makebelieve. Lucrezia can hardly feed herself without the castle's help. Going anywhere would be a struggle. But haven't they always lived on stories and possibilities?

She holds his hands close to her chest, bringing one up to kiss his knuckles. They smell of iron, blood, but she tries a smile still. "Anywhere. Beyond the dead zone. I heard there are giraffes that speak."

[ofhope]

It most certainly is. There would be nowhere they can go, not in the Live Zone. He can be fast, he can hide, but she is different. In every way she would slow him down and be a risk, but would that matter?

Would reason stop him, now as more and more whispers continue to nibble just inside his ears, tickling and hurting just enough to make him shake his head again. With his hands taken away, that seems the next best thing, but isn't that the same logic a dog with an itch might use?

"I would just be weaker. I would just be like then." He doesn't know that it would be, or could be different. "I shouldn't...go there. I couldn't be strong enough."

[lucre]

Lucrezia clasps their hands together so he can't pull them free so easily, still putting on a brave smile even if she knows that he can't see it. Perhaps it is more to her benefit. She needs to believe her own stories before she can make him follow her after all.

"You would not need to be strong because we will be safe. No enemies, no secret weapons."