She perceived a darkness that she hated and feared

[inafadingcrown]

Who: Galadriel and whoever wants to interact with her
What: A log for all things during the Paranatural Event. Gathered here to avoid spamming the comm. I’m just repeating the general comment I left in the main log and putting subsections with days and possibilities in the comments. Respond with an interaction or else just let me know you want one and I’ll come up with something. Alternately, ping me for plotting. Prose or bracket spam is fine.
When: 8/22-8/27-ish
Where: The Clinic, various places in the castle, Galadriel's room
Rating: PG-13? Will contain mentions of blood, hallucinations, possible talk of past battles and all that entails, etc. Will update warnings as necessary.

[When the mirrors first began to cover the lobby, Galadriel felt nothing more than a vague sense of unease, which she thought natural enough- nothing about these events bodes well, after all. But as time goes on, that vague sense grows into something more defined: a distinct feeling that something is terribly wrong.

And then the hallucinations start. It's small things at first- her hands coated in blood, the smell of sea. But it's not long before things have progressed to the point where she's seeing those she has slain- standing there, looking sorrowfully at her when she turns a corner. In the mirrors, out of the corners of her eyes. At times she even sees the Kinslaying itself. Hears the cries of dying men ringing in her ears.

Even without the tears of blood that sometimes streamed from her eyes, it was enough to drive her into seclusion. She retreats to her room, allowing only a few inside, and contemplates the solution to her problems privately.]

Comments

8/22- mild hallucinations and paranoia, bleeding from the eyes

[inafadingcrown]

Clinic

[inafadingcrown]

[Galadriel has spent a great deal of time inside the clinic working as a healer. Entering it is usually a natural, every-occurrence, but today she does so with a certain amount of hesitancy and nervousness. But something was dreadfully wrong with her- that was quickly becoming obvious- and she had little choice but to address it.

She lingers in the doorway a moment, looking for some assistance, a handkerchief pressed against her eyes to catch the blood leaking from her eyes.]

[radiantwingedone]

[ Duke walks from one side of the clinic to the next, arms full of gauze packages before he registers there's someone at the door. ]

Would you like aid?

[inafadingcrown]

[Ah- she recognizes him. Under more ordinary circumstances, she might even feel slightly awkward about this. But now, she's too worried to care.]

I would. [Strange, being a patient and not the healer.]

[radiantwingedone]

[ Ah, now he recognizes her.

No matter. Duke turns and washes his hands. ]

Make yourself comfortable. I'll get a towel. [ Blood has a distinct smell that he really doesn't like- ]

[inafadingcrown]

[She does wonder how he's going to be able to do much without being able to see, but she's polite enough to keep her mouth shut. And besides, she's miserable enough that she'll take help where she can get it.]

You have my thanks. [She seats herself on one of the nearby exam beds and tilts her head lightly to the side, listening.] Do you hear that?

[No. He can't. He can't possibly. It doesn't make any sense to hear the clashing of swords, the sounds of the sea. It makes no sense at all.]

[radiantwingedone]

[ Three years of it is a good explanation. Another is 'magic'. ]

None necessary. [ He returns with the promised towel, which is unfortunately white, but there probably isn't that many options otherwise.

... Hear? ]

I hear you, sometimes the electrical appliances, occasionally myself. [ He pauses, thinking. ]

... I can offer ear plugs, if what you are hearing is bothering you. It could help?

[ If its in her head, that is well beyond what he knows how to help... ]

[inafadingcrown]

[She shakes her head, holding the towel to her face.] If you cannot hear it, then I fear the issue is not with my hearing.

[She's going mad. That's all there is to it. If he hadn't handed her the towel, she would wonder if she was actually bleeding or if that was all in her mind too.]

8/23-8/25 Continued paranoia and bleeding, moderate to severe hallucinations

[inafadingcrown]

8/23 evening

[lightbranded]

Will was worried.

One of the Doctors was dead, and two others had been taken by some sort of monster in the woods. A monster that was outside all of his knowledge. He had spent most of the day in the library researching, and watching the journal for more news.

He hadn't even allowed himself to grieve for Ten yet. Will was an Old One, and something in him would not let him allow himself to grieve until he could be certain that the danger was past.

But worry he allowed himself. And so in the evening he comes in search of the people he had become close to in Paradisa. Galadriel first of all. He knocks on her door.

[inafadingcrown]

There's an uncharacteristically long delay before Galadriel opens the door and when she does, it's exceedingly obvious that something is terribly wrong. She holds a handkerchief to her eyes, trying to stop the blood from streaking down her face, and stares at Will for a few seconds before offering her usual nod of greeting, as if she needs the time to figure out what and who she's truly seeing.

"Will." Even her voice sounds different- tired and worn. "Forgive me, I am... not well."

[lightbranded]

Will could only stare in shock and worry at first.

"Your eyes," he manages. "What happened? Are you alright?"

[inafadingcrown]

Slowly, she shakes her head. As much as she'd like to claim that she would be alright, she doesn't think she could make it sound convincing at this point.

"Please come in. I would prefer not to discuss this in the halls." It's not partially the paranoia, yes, but there's also a little bit of shame and embarrassment, illogical as that may be. The castle must be behind it (at least she hopes so), but she's quite clearly going mad. Galadriel would prefer not to announce that to the world.

[lightbranded]

Will wastes no time in coming into the room after her. He had already been worried. This just gave him even more cause for worry. What could cause someone's eyes to bleed?

[inafadingcrown]

She shuts the door firmly behind him and moves to the sitting room, waiting for him to sit before she does. There's a long moment of silence while she contemplates just what to say and how to say it. To try to keep the fear from creeping into her voice.

"I can find no rational explanation for it." Rational. The thoughts that pull at the back of her mind, that it's punishment, that it's vengeance for the blood she has spilt, are not rational. She realizes that.

"And what you see is only a part of what ails me." She hesitates before continuing, obviously (and uncharacteristically) nervous.

[lightbranded]

"Why? What is wrong?"

Will guessed from her tone that it was something terrible.

23rd

[toobravehearted]

[ It felt that the harder he tried to keep everyone all together and safe, the more he was losing a grip on that. It wasn't unusual for the Doctor to be so on the go, but he was hampered and it continually played on his mind. He kept hearing wind chimes that no one else could and voices that accused him of his guilt and failure, things that flitted just at the corners of his vision, not to mention this inexplicable manifestation of blood. Overall, it was getting harder for him to concentrate.

When it dawned on him that he had not seen Galadriel during all of this, he had loudly berated himself. Stupid Doctor. No doubt she didn't want to see him anyway, who would after what he had done? Nevertheless he went directly to her room to start, his guilt would not stop him looking for her to make sure she was all right, and he started here by rapping on her door. ]

Re: 23rd

[inafadingcrown]

[There is a reason that he has not seen her through all of this. Quite simply, she has not seen a reason to inflict her company on others. The state she's in, she's certainly more a burden than a help and would be of little use in any rescue; it's difficult to concentrate on anything with your greatest sin being constantly paraded in front of your eyes.

She opens the door slowly, almost reluctantly, a handkerchief pressed to her eyes- and simply stares when she sees that he's in a similar state.]

Doctor.

clinic }

[ensorceler]

[ The shades carried with the most recent events remind her all-too-much of a certain ship that went to Hell in the stars. She'd had enough of a taste, that she has no wish to repeat anything she might remember, but there is ever the lure of friends in need. Even that can conquer her selfish fears; not of death, but of torture.

There are precious few left who might warrant her presence away from the "safety" of her chambers, but Anne keeps an eye for any of they who might be suffering time in the clinic. ]

[inafadingcrown]

[Galadriel almost seems like she doesn't want to be seen in the clinic. Perhaps a part of her doesn't. It's...embarrassing to be laid low like this, for lack of a better word. Embarrassing to be so vulnerable, to feel that her mind was fraying at the edges and that it was plain for all to see.

But there was no escaping it. She was not so foolish as to avoid the clinic because of her own shame; it was better, however distasteful she might find it, to have a second pair of eyes looking her over- especially now, when she could not trust her own.

So she does not shy away from view (as if she could, at her height). Instead, she gives Anne as much of a normal nod of greeting as she can manage while wiping blood from her face and looking thoroughly miserable.]

[ensorceler]

[ Upon seeing Galadriel (momentary Elizabeth, as always, but moreso now in her fraying mentality), she hurries her steps closer. Having been stuck in this clinic more times than she would like, she feels a strong sympathy for the elder woman. She doesn't yet know why Galadriel is here, but that she is here at all does little to soothe one's soul for the events. ]

My lady.

[ Hesitating not to seat herself on the bed's edge, Anne reaches out to brush her fingers against the woman's brow, murmuring a prayer for her. ]

What sad cause have you here?

[inafadingcrown]

[Gentle words and a gentle touch come as something of a surprise. Perhaps they shouldn't have; it not generous of her to expect less of others than she would of herself, in this case. But she has spent much of the day with near- constant reminders of her greatest sin. To be shown kindness now- not just a clinician's courtesy, but concern and kindness seems more than she deserves.

There's something maternal, too, in Anne's gesture, strange as the age difference between them makes it, and right here and now, that strikes a chord with Galadriel. It's been so long, so many hundreds of years, since she's seen her own mother. But she could remember- that was the blessing and curse of Elvish memory. She could remember with perfect clarity what it was to be comforted, to have a parent to turn to in her fear...

She can't help it; she begins to weep, quietly and softly, her tears mingling with the tears of blood already streaming down her face. She's going to be a mess and she knows she must look ridiculous, but even Galadriel has her breaking point.]

Forgive me. [She shakes her head, covering her face with her hands.] It is not simple to explain. [Or rather- it's simple to describe and impossible to explain]

[ensorceler]

[ The sight of the strange tears is even more startling than the other woman's appearance in so mundane a placement. She reacts without thinking, the maternal instincts she feels for Galadriel not simple, either. Both hands cradle her jaw, sliding beneath and pushing away the others' hands so that she can wipe at the tears with her thumbs. It does little to help the appearance, with the blood streaking. ]

My lady, I cannot believe anything about your character could share the same breath with simplicity.

[ Anne shakes her head, and with a gentle urging, scoots so that she can guide Galadriel's head to rest in her lap, with a Sssh, sssh; Here, here. She is even taller than Henry or Elizabeth, but the bed is large enough to humor this move, so that the great lady can still rest while she weeps, and Anne may comb her fingers through her hair.

Her skirts will be ruined by the blood, of course, but she worries not for it. There are many dresses, but only one Galadriel. And even she, so old and wise, was clearly shaken by the events. Again Anne thinks so easily of that ship sailing for Hell; Of what it had done to her. ]

It is the burden of knowledge that scares away simple things, and simple thoughts. Under the weight of grief, all else is crushed.

[inafadingcrown]

[It's so rare that she's afforded this luxury. To weep openly. To be less than strong, less than the Lady of Light, if only for a moment. What Anne offers her now is a gift- one that she desperately needs.

It's a few moments before she's able to get her tears under control, before she raises her head and wipes her eyes.]

It will not stop. [She glances down at the blood on her fingertips, blinking away the larger blood stain that seemed to coat her arm. Not there. It's not really there.]

And... [She lets out another soft sob and bites down on her bottom lip- an old, childish habit that she'd mostly abandoned long ago.] I fear that I can no longer trust my own senses.

[ensorceler]

[ She doesn't know at all if these red tears are the manner of an elf, or if it is the effect of this castle. As Galadriel sits back up and answers, Anne can't keep herself from leaning closer, hovering as a mother would.

Laughable, given so many things, but something she's incapable of changing. It's why she doesn't go out of her way to see the woman, because it fills needs that only later bring her more pain in hindsight. ]

It is all Paradisa can do, to remind us of our own failures. Even the mighty.

[ Slipping from the bed, Anne finds a tissue box to bring over, pulling out several before leaning and trying to wipe again beneath Galadriel's eyes, even if her care is uninvited, along with her unnecessary jesting. ]

But no matter how you stumble, it shall never topple you. You stand too firm; too tall. Perhaps it is threatened.