paradisalogs | Happy, Happy Birthday

Who: Fred, Elektra and YOU
What: Elektra's Birthday
When: Monday Night
Where: Caritas
Rating: How much trouble can they really get into?

Her head had been especially busy of late, taking a bit of a double blow with Charles and Vivian both leaving. Especially Charles. He'd been making plans. Getting a place in town. Moving in with Vivian. It all felt especially abrupt and Fred couldn't help but wonder if she'd made the best of the time they had. Thoughts like that always seemed to bring Fred to the kitchen. And at least, this particular instance, there was a particular project she could focus her efforts on.

Elektra's birthday.

Fred was fairly certain if she'd attempted to openly make plans with the other woman, they would have been brushed aside. Which left her with no other option than the surprise, a small get together with her friends in Caritas. As far a Elektra knew, Fred just wanted some company after Gunn's departure. What really waited for her was balloons, streamers and a three-tiered cake. (Those were very busy thoughts to counter). The smallest of katanas sat next to it -- no bigger than a letter opener really -- ready to cut chocolate topped with butter cream into manageable slices.

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That's not...I'm not...

[She looks at him intently. There's things she has to do tonight, and pretending is what's getting her through them]

There's still a party going on. [And she won't be mentioning Charles by name yet either] I'm not hiding in the barn this time, isn't that better?

[Of course they've lost Cordy since then too. Spike. But this feels different, for more personal reasons]

I know there's a party going on and you want to push through it for Elektra's sake. And not hiding is better, of course it is. But I just wanted you to know that I'm here. Okay? You can lean on me if you have to.

[He, out of anyone, knows just how much Gunn had meant to Fred and what a blow it is to lose him all over again.]

If it gets too much - if you feel like you need to take a break, now, or later on, I can always cover for you.

Wesley... [Her fingertips brush against his] I know.

[That he sees. That he understands. But also? That he's lost somebody too]

[For a few brief seconds, he lets her see his own pain. He and Gunn had finally been turning that corner in becoming friends again. Another opportunity lost. He'll miss Charles terribly. And Vivian. But there's nothing that can be done about it. All they can do is hope that the both of them are safe and well back home.

The part which gets to him the most, however, is the thought of them no longer knowing or remembering each other. They'd found each other here, but back home? They'd never met. It's a distressing thought.

He takes a breath and tries to steady himself emotionally as well. It helps that she's right there, touching him, bolstering him in return.]

We'll get through this. We always do.

[Did they, though? Is that the truth? She struggles daily with showing Wesley how she feels about him. Really feels. For fear of what...some kind of retaliation by a sentient castle? He deserved so much more than that. But for the moment, Fred pushes all that down.

Leaning across the beer they're both still holding, Fred presses a lingering kiss to Wesley's cheek. For all her rambles, sometimes it's easier without words]

[He closes his eyes for a moment, leaning into the warmth of the kiss. What would he do if she was taken from him like the others? He isn't sure if he'd be able to function anymore. It's the sort of scenario he doesn't like to allow himself to dwell on for more than a few seconds at a time for fear of thoroughly depressing himself.]

Shall we go for a walk later? Just the two of us?

That sounds...good. Actually, it sounds really good. I don't think I even particularly care where.

[Just away. From the castle. From her own head. It's the sort of journey she always used to take alone, even if it was just to the roof. But she does want Wesley there.

Fred almost asks, then, if they're alright. But even just then the questions sounds ridiculous in her head. She hate how things like this make hesitate, and how everything feels as if it's closing in]

Maybe the right words will come to her when they take that walk. Fred's gaze flickers down at the bottles]

...one of us is probably going to have to let go.

[She's right, of course. He belatedly looks down at the bottles too. Then lets go, shifting back so that she can carry them. She can handle it, he knows she can.]

I'll come and find you.

[Hopefully she knows by now that he'll be there to help pick up the pieces for as long as she wants him to. Her emotional well-being means everything to him.]

[Fred quickly adjusts her stance, accounting for the shift in weight. That part, at least, is easy. Words are a bit more elusive. She can't thank him -- there are rules, after all. And somehow a simple 'I know' doesn't quite fit the bill either. It feels like she's assuming something or even worse? Taking him for granted.

It just might be that the right thing then is to tell Wesley the truth. That she loves him. So why is it so hard in that moment.

She lands on a smile -- his smile at least -- before heading for the stairs]

Happy, Happy Birthday

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