if you don't leave you will kill or be killed

[ex_garroter234]

Who: Micheletto and you
What: the most ridiculous intro i've ever written
When: 13/December, late afternoon
Where: the duck pond
Rating: ducks.

[There is currently a very nonplussed-looking man standing knee-deep in the duck pond. He has apparently been there for at least several minutes, because the ducks have become accustomed to his presence enough where they aren't too afraid to come close.

His hair is a little damp, too. Maybe he fell in earlier? Regardless, he's still just standing there. It's a little weird. Surely someone in such a catatonic state could use some assistance!

Of course, the second any hypothetical assistance gets close enough, he's going to grab them and toss them into the pond. Maybe that's why he looks so puzzled.]

[ooc.: during this post, micheletto's also experiencing his first temporary loss, wherein he will just shove people into the pond reflexively if they get within arm's reach. because it's funny. prose or actionspam, you decide!]

Comments

[assassino]

[Ezio laughs, probably at him rather than with him.]

Then what are you waiting for, just standing there?

[ex_garroter234]

[Micheletto stares at him for a moment, quiet, maybe trying to decide if it's worth it to fuck this guy's shit up. Apparently it isn't, because he starts to climb out of the pond instead.

Of course, once he's close enough to Ezio, he compulsively reaches to push him into the water. So maybe that was a moot decision.]

[assassino]

Hey––!

[Ezio wasn't expecting that -- he resists the moment Micheletto grabs him, but if he's going down, then Micheletto is going with him!]

[ex_garroter234]

[Renaissance men falling into a pond full of ducks in a deadly embrace: the thread.

By which I mean Micheletto certainly does fall back into the water. The shove was magically reflexive, but the punch he throws in Ezio's direction as they fall is just regular instinct.]

[assassino]

[It's been a while since Ezio's taken a punch, or even thrown one, but he takes it like it's been hours. It's easy to fall back into that old habit as he forces Micheletto up and off him so he can swing right back.]

[ex_garroter234]

[This is not a very conventional Paradisa greeting at all and I would like to speak to my travel agent.

Micheletto takes the punch and then swings his arm out again, though this is more of a shove than another punch, and then he's scrambling to his feet.]

[assassino]

[No, it's the BEST THE BEST THE BEST.

Ezio stumbles in the water when shoved, and then gets up too to give chase.]

Cazzo di merda, what the fuck is your problem?

[ex_garroter234]

[He gestures emphatically. GET OUT.]

I should ask you the same.

[He's pretty sure Ezio is the one who started this. There's really no other explanation, because Micheletto certainly didn't make a conscious decision to go sprawling back into the duck pond.]

[assassino]

You threw me in the water, you bastard!

[ex_garroter234]

If I had wanted to push you into water, the result would have been very different.

[assassino]

Then how the fuck do you explain what just happened?!

[ex_garroter234]

Again, I ask you the same thing.

[This is getting annoying, so he might be reaching for his sword. B[ Go away.]

[assassino]

I have nothing to answer to.

[Ezio reaches for his own sword. WELL FUCK THIS GUY.]

[ex_garroter234]

[Micheletto doesn't even bother responding, just lunges at him with the sword. This is ridiculous they're standing in the duck pond. The ducks are just swimming on the other side ...]

[assassino]

[Ezio raises to block, then moves to disarm.]

[ex_garroter234]

[Micheletto drops his sword but pulls a dagger simultaneously, moving to tackle Ezio back into the pond.]

[assassino]

[He sees that dagger –– god, he's glad for over a decade of training –– and steps to the side. He doesn't fancy getting stabbed, but he doesn't fancy getting put underwater, either.]

[ex_garroter234]

[YEAH you should be nicer to Uncle Mario, Ezio; you would have some unwanted holes, otherwise! Also, later he dies.

Micheletto flips his dagger into a reverse grip, which gives him a more limited range, but probably looks scarier -- the implication being that he doesn't expect Ezio to manage escape.]

I do not take kindly to being kidnapped.

[assassino]

I don't give a shit how you take to kidnapping, as I am not your kidnapper!

[Ezio keeps an eye on that dagger, glad he has his hidden blades.]

[ex_garroter234]

Then tell me who is, and you'll be unimportant to me.

[assassino]

It is the castle itself, a living god!

[ex_garroter234]

[The flattest look imaginable ........ then he just turns around and starts to climb out of the water. He'll get his sword later; he's not about to stand there and converse with a mad person in a duck pond.]

[assassino]

[ANNOYED]

Where are you from, madman?

[ex_garroter234]

[DISMISSIVELY] Rome.

[assassino]

[That gets Ezio to lift his sword again.]

And what year?